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Dear Abby columnist Jeanne Phillips.

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Dear Abby columnist Jeanne Phillips.

Abby: Doubt prevents man from enjoying life

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Dear Abby: No matter what I do, I am never satisfied. I have a great wife and two great kids, and yet I always feel like I could have done better with my life. I go to work and no matter how hard I work, I feel like I never get recognition for it. When I go out with friends, we have a great time, but I never feel like I am really part of the group. I feel like the outcast who gets invited just so they won’t feel bad.

I don’t know why I feel this way. I do suffer from depression and have spoken to a specialist. People often tell me that I spread myself too thin and never relax enough to enjoy my success. But how can I relax when I always feel unsatisfied with my efforts? — Just Not Satisfied


Dear Not Satisfied: A way to do that would be to start by examining why you are so hard on yourself. Whether it was caused by parents who didn’t give you the validation you needed while growing up or a lack of self-esteem, until you understand why you are hurting yourself this way, your problem won’t be resolved. You say you have spoken to “a specialist” about your depression. Perhaps it’s time for another visit and a chat about what’s really bothering you.

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NCAA

Bless your heart
Bless your heart